Anonymous asked: my ex and i were in a long distance relationship and last summer we got to spend a month with eachother after not seeing eachother for almost 9 months. this is gonna be super personal but i dont really know which other way to put it... during the summer is when we started giving oral to eachother and things like that. we never had a problem with him getting hard at all, and i could easily do it. then i went to go visit him again a few months after, and we were ready to have sex for the first time (we're both virgins). he had the condom on and was on top of me and everything, but he couldnt get hard. i tried getting it up for him by giving him oral but nothing, and he even tried doing it himself, too, but nothing. we didnt end up having sex because of it. i know for a fact that he didnt cheat on me or anything, and i told him i felt like it was my fault that he didnt get hard but he said that it wasn't, and that it was because he was really nervous. can nervous-ness really affect him like that? we were really in the moment too.......

Dear Nervous Virgin;

OMG nerves can destroy the BIGGEST Hard on! Especially the “she/he-is-really-naked-right-next-to-me” kind of hard-ons.  And of course he didn’t cheat. He wouldn’t be nervous if he cheated. He’d be like whatever about it. Take his softy for a sign of how much he likes/respects/cares about you and go easy next time. Make it fun. Giggle. USE A CONDOM! and it will be the awkward first time sexual experience that we all have had. 

xo

Muffin